The One in Which I Answer Some Questions...and then Talk About Some I Can't Answer

How is my treatment going?
I began week 3 of treatments yesterday! Yay, ME!  Since I have 6 weeks, and I have 2 weeks done, that would 2/6  or 1/3 done...(See, Fifth Grade Math can be very useful!) and that's just chemo, which I take 7 days a week.

Radiation is 5 days a week times 6 weeks, which a total of 30 days. I've had 9 radiation treatments so far, or 9/30 <--which, in simplest form is 3/10 (Fifth Graders, rock on!) In percentages, I can be more accurate though...that's 30%!
and if you don't know how I got that answer, ask a fifth grader. (Although with Common Core, everything's different, so they might say, "Tomatoes plus cucumbers divided by garlic equals gazpacho.")
I kid. I kid.*

After your six week treatment, then what?
That's a tricky one because there are parts that I can answer and parts that I can't answer...So I'll do the best I can:

After the 6 weeks of treatment, they're going to give my brain a vacation of sorts (I'd really like to go to Key West, but the doctors seem dubious about insurance paying for that.) Then I start taking the same chemo 5 days per month and being "off" for the rest of the month. And I will get regular MRI's to monitor the dealio (which is not actually a technical term, but which sounds way more friendly and innocuous than "tumor cell growth".) As long as things are copacetic, we just keep on, keepin' on.

Beyond this is the stuff that I don't have the answers. Because I don't have a crystal ball, but I do have a Magic 8 ball, and that's nearly as good, right?  It says <shake, shake, shake!>....wait for it....

copacetic! (Amazing! What are the odds???)

If the Magic 8 ball happens to be wrong, I could then go with a Ouiji board...but we all know that someone always cheats with that shit. And that is when we enter into questions that I cannot answer at this time.

So...Moving On!

What are your plans after the 6 Week treatment is over?
I have some big plans after this 6 week treatment is over! They say that it can take between 2-6 months after treatment to start feeling like "your old self". But since I'm a Mother Fuckin' Brain Cancer Fighting Ninja Warrior, I give it ...
2-6 months. Hey, we're bad ass, but we are human. This isn't CGI!

Some things I'm really looking forward to after treatment:

My family is getting together for the December holidays!!!
We are still hammering out the details but my folks will be here in California, and we're working on a place that will accommodate us all. Or preferably two smaller places - one in which the doggies can roam freely, and another in which my dad can NOT have the dogs roam freely. I'll probably still be pretty wiped out since my treatment will have just ended 2 weeks before, but...all I want is to be able give and get lots of hugs and kisses, and nap and walk and laugh a LOT. All of which sounds totally doable, no? Just thinking about having all of us together makes me a little giddy!

But wait! There's more! <said in my best Ron Popeil voice>
(Kiddies, google that shit. I even gave you convenient link to google on the top right of the page. At least until google sends me a cease and desist letter.)

I'm going to be a grandma!!!!! 

Autumn Elizabeth is due the last week of February/first week of March 2015.
She will probably look cuter than this when she arrives, but Awwwwww!

I'm soooooo excited to be the obnoxious grandmother that I always promised that I would be. And when I say, "obnoxious", I mean it in the best possible sense. Like, buying her cute little cowboy boots and insisting on holding her for long times when April & Coffey come to visit....not "obnoxious" like buying her first cigarettes and encouraging her to drop out of high school to start a band.

Steven & I are hosting a winemaker cruise down the Seine April 2 - 9, 2015

I know it was almost sold out the last time I heard, but if you're interested, click here for more info. 

I'm almost excited about this as about being a grandma (I'm totally lying. How could that be???? Impossible!) But it's gonna be SWEEEEET! It starts and finishes in Paris, going to Normandy (HISTORY GEEK ALERT!!! I've never been to Normandy!), and we are going to be pouring some kick ass wine on board the ship! Woooot!
I'm sorry. That wasn't very professional of me. Sorry, SKW Management Team! Good thing that I have a #freepass! Xoxoxo

Daughter, Katherine, is graduating for University California- Santa Barbara in June. 
Well, she will actually be finished with her classes in March, but she will walk in June. See, UC's are on a quarter system. Which means that you have to take more classes and have less time to finish them. And if you ask me, that is some Common Core bullshit.* UC Santa Barbara is a bitchin' school, though. Excellent academic reputation and RIGHT ON THE PACIFIC OCEAN. Seriously? The first time I googled that shit, I thought it was a joke.

You see what I mean??I

I leave you with a hilarious link that Alison Cohn Jameson shared with me on FB. It gives you some insight into what happens to a Ninja when they are not quite feeling themselves.

*I really have no gripe about Common Core. It's just such an easy target.