The One in Which I Describe My Amazing August...LIFE

In the last month, I've had four very special events - I was able to squeeze all that in because I had to have a root canal, and that pushed my chemo cycle back 2 weeks. So, let's all give a cheer for Root Canals! Hip-hip- ....haha! <silver lining, people!>

SKWinery BBQ -  Although, I just started working at the SK Winery last spring, they welcomed with me with open arms. They've been family to Steven for 18 years, and we have the good fortune to feel the love and support this year of this family. I hope someday, when I'm done with this chemo crap and my speech gets a little bit better, to rejoin the weekend crew in the tasting room. I'm sure they miss my singing in the tasting station between pours. <sarcastic tone> (You can blame my Mom & Dad for that one. Fremer Rule: Anytime something reminds you of a song, you must belt it out - or sing it under your breath when more appropriate. Catie has the same rule. Kindred Spirits! She even makes up her songs! I'm sorry you've had to go solo for the time being, but thank you for all your thoughts and prayers. <smooches!>)

Catie, my "singing partner", and loving part of our SK Winery Family in Patti's adorable BBQ Barn

Anyway, (that was some serious digression. #cancercard and TWO #freepasses) every year they have the staff summer BBQ. Last weekend, I was able to attend and be surrounded by our family winery. How lucky we are!

Hiking Trip - I wrote about this already (click here if you missed it), so I won't go into great detail about this. I'll just say that it's chock full of family and nostalgia and laughing and LOVE. (And that little bit about me falling on my tailbone. (Kiddos - Helpful tip: those little squishy neck pillows for flying? Work perfectly as tailbone donuts! See! even WITH brain cancer, I thought of that by myself! Imagine how clever I was before that bugger showed up*! j/k! <snortle!> )

Dad & his kiddos pretending we are just starting our hike. Psssst. Secret: We had already finished our hike.

Manresa State Beach - We have had a family tradition of camping at Manresa State Beach for about 4 days every summer. Yes, walk-in tent camping with a Coleman stove, campfires & s'mores, and sleeping bags, and card games by lantern light. The one "luxury" we allow ourselves are inflatable mattresses. I think there was a year when the girls didn't change clothes the whole time they were there - except for into bathing suits, of course. (A Girly-Girl just wouldn't understand the fun in that - We are not Girly-Girls.) Not everyone could come this time, and we missed you, April, Coffey, Autumn, and Katherine!!! The dogs, however, had a blast.

June, Aidan, and Sara on Manresa State Beach, August 2015 (A Girly-Girl would never wear that hat in public.)

This transition that our family is going through... It's natural when you have adult children, but it's really hitting me now because we've always had at least one child in the home with us. Our move to Livermore will mean that we have no children living with us anymore - the classic Empty Nest Syndrome. It's getting harder and harder to get all of us together at one time.  Steven and I took a page from my parents' book and decided that we'll continue to schedule Family Gatherings and cross our fingers that most of us can show up. If we wait until everyone's free, these gatherings become farther and farther apart. And our unofficial new designated Family Organizer, April, is doing a great job getting us together as much as possible. <Thank you, and I love you!>

Daou Winery- 
So, it was very special on Sunday to have all the children together, plus our granddaughter. Since Sara turned 21 in July, it's the first time that the whole family was able to taste wine together <eh hem> ... legally....in public. Katherine is still in Santa Barbara, so we were looking for a place to meet halfway. The ALMOST-GENIUS-IF-IT-WEREN'T-FOR-HER-BRAIN-CANCER (*see above) came up with the idea of meeting at Daou. It's almost exactly midway between San Jose and Santa Barbara, and it's an amazing view of the hills of Paso Robles. They serve real food paired with wines, and our tasting room associate was lovely and patient. Warning: if you ever find yourself surrounded by the six Mirassous, plus son-in-love, Coffey and little Autumn...it can be ....shall we say: overwhelming - in a good way.... in the most amazing, loving, witty, and raucous way you can imagine. Sara's boyfriend, Matt, has already acclimated himself to the chaos, and Katherine's boyfriend survived, so he passed the first test. (hee hee) Sometimes, I just sit back and watch my children interact, yelling and laughing across the table, and I get actual goosebumps. And I look at Schmoopy, and I think "We made this." And now Autumn has added a whole 'nother layer. (Which April & Coffey made...just to clarify...) Magical.

The Whole Family! Look at that view!

Autumn loves Grandpa Steven! He makes her laugh! 

Grandma June tried to get baby Autumn to take a nap, but there was too much going on! The snuggles were good, though!

As we were driving home from Daou, I was playing it all through my mind as I looked out the window - and I got to thinking about all the wonderful memories from just ONE MONTH of my life. I thought, I hope no one is feeling sorry for me right now. Not every month is like this one was, but this is my LIFE. I feel sorry for people that have never experienced the flood of love and laughter that fills my life. It may be cut short, and that will be sad if it happens, but please don't feel sorry for me. I am having the most magical, amazing, lucky life one can imagine. And I SEE IT. I FEEL IT. I GET IT. I'm not missing anything right now. As I've said before, some times we have to adapt - Life is constantly changing for everyone. But that doesn't take the MAGIC away.

I SEE IT. I FEEL IT. I GET IT.

The One in Which I Have a Dream

(Hint: Scroll down to the update if you'd rather not reminisce about last year.)
♬ "I had a dream..."🎶

Shameful admission on the get-go: MOST sensible adults associate that phrase with Martin Luther King, Jr., but I've more than proven myself to be a not-so-sensible adult...
So, I sing this phrase (mostly in my head) every time I think of it, like Ethel Merman in Gypsy, singing "Everything's Coming Up Roses"...

You don't know it? You heathens!

 I googled that sh-sh-sh-ssssstuff....I feel that it would be inappropriate to use the real "s" word when talking about Ethel Merman because she is a Dame or something, isn't she? If she isn't, she should be...and damned if she isn't on youtube!

Everything's Coming Up Roses!

If you haven't ever seen the play, it's about an Uber Stage Mom who eventually pushes her "less talented" daughter into a life of stripping. That's an oversimplification of the plot, but it's a real tear-jerker. Trust me. Not AT ALL like "Dance Moms". Except possibly the stripper part.

AS I was saying...before my brain took a little bird walk...(#freepass)
I had a dream. Steven and I had a dream.

For the better part of 18 years, Steven has been commuting to Livermore while we've lived in San Jose, It's  a 40- 45 minute commute (if there's no traffic). Of course, some people have it a lot worse in the Bay Area. I get that.  But it still sucks. And Harvest Time is a whole 'nother dimension. It calls for 17 hour days and very little sleep.

But we were fully ensconced in the San Jose community - I have been working here, and it seemed like we always had at least one kid in high school here. It seemed cruel to have them switch schools in that very "delicate" time in their lives.

Now, we were ready to move to Livermore. We even had a plan.  August 2015.  Kids are (mostly) out of the house, grandbaby on the way...The two of us and our two rescue doggies on some property, a stone's throw from downtown Livermore (which is really cute!) and the winery. Eventually, we wanted to live on vineyard property, make and sell the wine right there.

Then life threw us a curve ball.

THANKS, LIFE! (said in a really snotty, sarcastic way. Think: Mean Girls.)

But what Steven and I were talking about on our daily walk yesterday (I told you sometimes we talk about BIG stuff!)....is that if that was really our dream...It is STILL our dream.

But there's nothing like having a potentially deadly illness to wake a person up, and shake them around, and say, "If not now, when????"

There are a lot of trite, bullshitty quote things about overcoming challenges on the interwebs. (Pinterest practically has the market cornered, so don't bother investing), but I happen to like this one:

"The positive thinker sees the invisible, 

feels the intangible, 

and achieves the impossible."

So, this our dream, our vision (as I see it right now):  

Family events at the winery

A table to share good wine and food with our family and friends.

Adirondack chairs overlooking the vineyard are not optional. I don't know why. I love them.

Walks with the puppies. And don't tell Capi that she's not "winery dog material". I'll cut you.

Steven has another another vision of driving his grandbabies on a John Deere, but this was the best that I could come up with:

I think it is an actual John Deere baby stroller???

I challenge Steven to do the same - really envision what we want - and then we make that mother fucker happen! 

<Dorky high fives!!!!>

I love you, Schmoopy! <-- I'm pretty sure this sounds even better when we're sitting in Adirondack chairs.
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Update - 9/5/15 This is happening! We are packing and moving to Livermore within the next two weeks! We've already started to move stuff into the garage up there! Very exciting times! We both can't wait until we can be a part of the Livermore community full-time. And just in time for Harvest '15! The whites are in, and the reds will begin being picked within the next three weeks, according to Schmoopy.

In case you haven't heard, our new place will be right in the middle of Ghielmetti Vineyard, which will make it much more convenient for Steven to manage. And we may not have The Hill to walk around, but instead, we'll have rows and rows of vines. 

Here's a sneak peek at the view out the back of our new house:

The doggy fence needs some work, and we'll have to figure out where the Adirondack chairs belong!

Stay tuned, Livermore peeps because we plan to have an open house soon - with the understanding that we're still moving in, so it will probably still be disaster. But you know what my motto is: Don't Wait! Live NOW!  

We will also be celebrating my Cancerversary! It's just a few short weeks until it's been a YEAR since my surgery and diagnosis (September 24, 2014). Unfortunately, we're going to have to wait a few weeks though, because I'm scheduled for chemo that week. Wheeeee! Hey, I'm still here, and that's something to celebrate, right?!