The One in Which I Talk About the Power of Art and Whimsy

My parents with some of their grandbabies, a long, long time ago!

I have a confession to make: I'm not a "real" Californian. (FYI: I know most of you already know that. Just sayin') I'm a transplant from the East Coast. Truth is, most of the people living here are transplants - I could Google that Shit, but I don't really care all that much. It's a way to preface the rest of this: I moved here in 1992 because my husband IS a "real Californian whose family has been here since the Gold Rush - (the Pellier-Mirassou Side.) My parents were devastated when "HE moved us across the country - their daughter and two grandchildren". You see, my parents are amazing grandparents and we saw them very, very frequently before we moved. In fact, they made the decision when we did move that they would never let 3,000 miles get in between them and their grandchildren, so they cooked up a plan to make sure they see them every 6-8 weeks. With my dad's frequent flyer miles from all his business, they made it work.  They still have very close relationships with all are kids, and it took a lot of planning and work, but it's been awesome!

Getting to my point....

I remember one time sitting at our dining room table not long after we have moved, chatting with my father about how much he HATES California, and part of his reasoning was that Californians were "too optimistic". This comment has stuck with me. He was a born and bred New Yorker, and I grew up (mostly) in semi-rural New Jersey. How did "optimism" become a negative? (Maybe he will leave a comment below to explain what he exactly meant? Or he could share it with me privately, and I'll let you know, k?)

I don't know if I would paint a view like that about residents of CA, but I have been thinking a lot lately about making sure my life is filled with positivity, joy, and beauty. If ever there was a time for me try to be optimistic, this is certainly one of them. If you've been friends with me on Facebook, you know that I'm very close to cutting the cord there. I'm so tired of seeing and reading all the negativity and ugliness. It makes me sad. We all have this forum to share thoughts and ideas with so many people. What are you using it for? Just reflect on that a little bit, and ask yourself, "Why?" I'm not just talking about the political vitriol. Lean in to the screen for a second and I'll whisper: You know what? The people you are sharing all your very different political/spiritual beliefs are NOT going to change because of anything you write or share. Sorry to burst your bubble, but that's the truth.

But  I'm not talking about puppy or panda videos.  I know some people hate those, too, but I am a firm believer in the Power of Whimsy. Thus all the hours I spent on Pinterest looking at baby animals in my early days of recovery from my craniotomy. I've been reading a book called Radical Remission that goes into the science of the Power of happiness/positivity and healing. I highly recommend it to any other warriors out there.

Come on! Doesn't that make your heart smile?

Lately, though, I've also been compelled by the Power of Art. 

A couple blog posts ago, I made a comment about how you can make your own life. Here it is:

The One in Which I Explain my Paradigm Shift. I think one of my defining characteristics is my belief that we have a LOT of control of our own destiny, and in order to have things go your way, you have to think about how you would do it and then....DO IT. That seems to fly in the face of my father's belief about Californians, doesn't it? Because I was like that when I lived on the East Coast, too. I believe very strongly in living life purposefully. And alas, Dad, I think I was steeped in that belief from my earliest childhood...3,000 miles away from California.

My current situation has heightened this belief even more. Lately, as I contemplate my mortality more and more, and I think about how I want to spend the rest of my life ... (Hey, Kiddies, you know what? You can't sit up suddenly from your casket and shout, "Mulligan!") But guess what? I have some control over what I'm doing right now while I'm alive! Imagine that! We all do. And I call BULLSHIT if you try to convince me that you don't. No, you can't control everything (like these fucking cancer cells in my brain), but I CAN think about how I want to spend the time I have left - and plan my time so I can do some of that. 

So, let me just wrap this sucker up - I, personally, want to live in (see above) positivity, joy, and beauty. DUH! And I purposefully am planning things that give more of that - yes, spending time with family and friends, but also surrounding myself with things and places that make me happy, make me giggle, make me smile, my heart beat with joy. I've noticed that I'm spending much more time looking at art - literature, dance, music, paintings, and photographs and just STOPPING on a walk through the vineyard to notice a bunch of wildflowers. In the lucky times that I get to spend with my children and granddaughter, just looking at their faces, and listen to them laugh, and thinking how beautiful that is. How lucky I am. 

I'm not going to take a long time to get to the flip/downer side of this, but this is part of my point: I really, really, really don't understand why anyone would CHOOSE to do the opposite. Why are so many people out there focused on the ugly, evil, sad things in life? What. The. Fuck?  I'm not saying that we don't ever acknowledge it's there, because we need to do that sometimes in order to make changes. But don't wallow. That's all I'm saying. Yea, there is stuff out that sucks....oh, I don't know. Maybe like.....FUCKING BRAIN CANCER? But I prefer to look and think about this:

Or this:

Hey, this isn't even gratuitous! This picture of my granddaughter fits in with the context! Yay!

I could go on and on, but you get the idea....

So, here's a thought: the next time you feel compelled to go on a rant on Facebook (or whereever, for that matter - the parking lot, or your office lunch room?), instead,  read one of those classic novels that you've always wanted to read, but "never have time". Or go for a walk and look up at the sky or trees,  down at the grass or flowers. Or find out where your nearest art museum and go there when you have some spare time. 

You don't have any spare time, you say? Look in the eyes of your husband, wife,boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, grandparent....you know what I mean. Is it late at night? tip-toe in the bedroom and gaze at the sign of life - the breathing in and out. You know what? That's a beautiful thing, too. And a privilege.  

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P.S. I want to give a shout out to two FB friends from high shool days, Paul Liberti and Craig Shofed who inspired me by using Facebook as a medium to spread art and beauty.